Jun 30
Many ADHD women are known for being bold, outspoken, and strong-willed, but in a society where those attributes are often reserved for men it can leave us feeling like we’re “too much.” My guest this episode, author Andrea Owen, used to let this fear of taking up space prevent her from letting her stand out. In her mid-30s when she started to embrace her “too-muchness” she realized just how much she had been diminishing herself for the comfort of others.
Since then, Andrea has taught hundreds of thousands of women tools and strategies to empower themselves and live their most kick-ass life. Her most recent book, Make Some Noise: Speak Your Mind and Own Your Strength, felt like I was reading something I myself had written; the things Andrea struggled with are exactly the things that I and many ADHDers struggle with as well. Join us for an insightful conversation where we discuss the impact people-pleasing has on ADHD women, the importance of taking up space with our emotions and voice, how to have compassion for ourselves, and more.
APPLE
SPOTIFY
YOUTUBE
"We all grow up understanding, whether it was explicitly told to us or just thorough messaging, what it means to be a good girl, to be a good woman, and to be a good mother for those of us that choose to be mothers, it’s embedded in our DNA almost. To be outspoken and to be loud and powerful and ambitious, those are attributes that we reserve for men."
- Andrea Owen
"When you take up space with your voice and with your sense of humor, with your innate personality, that is yours, that is your birthright to be able to take up space."
- Andrea Owen
"The consensus seems to be we’re either too much of one thing or not enough of another."
- Andrea Owen
- Andrea shares her struggles with schoolwork and feeling like she was only valued for her physical appearance.
- Andrea discusses the societal expectations placed on women, including the idea that they should be emotional and nurturing, while also being ambitious and powerful.
- Andrea shares her experience with ADHD and how it affects her emotions, noting that she has learned to compartmentalize her emotions but is still deeply affected by certain things.
[23:41 - 33:33] ADHD Diagnosis, Self-Expression, and Gender Bias
- Andrea discusses her various diagnoses, including ADHD, impulse control disorder, nonverbal learning disorder, OCD, and auditory processing disorder.
- Andrea emphasizes the relevance of this story to ADHD women who often feel like they're too loud, funny, or much for others' liking, and the need to challenge these harmful societal expectations.
- Andrea discusses the importance of taking up space and being oneself, particularly for ADHD women who are often dismissed or told they are too smart or successful to have ADHD.
- Andrea shares a story about flipping off a man who honked at her as a teenager, revealing the early signs of street harassment and catcalling that continued throughout her life.
- Andrea realized she had been a feminist all along after taking a women's studies class, deconstructing patriarchy and misogyny.
- Andrea felt disillusioned and ashamed of her past behavior arguing with friends and coworkers about politics, now understanding the true meaning of feminism.
Instagram: @heyandreaowen
Website: andreaowen.com
Her book: Make Some Noise: Speak Your Mind and Own Your Strength
Workbook link: andreaowen.com/msn
