Jan 25
For our 29th episode, I have invited my friend Perry Janssen to our podcast. Perry lives in Seattle where she has been a psychotherapist for the past 30 years. Perry has taught at the university level, she’s had her own column, she’s been a radio host where she’s interviewed and learned from the likes of Dr. Christiane Northrup and Dr. Dan Siegel. She’s also been an educator, consultant and coach for Microsoft, Amazon, Nordstrom, Boeing; the list goes on and on. I had a list of questions prepared but since our most popular episodes have been about emotion and feelings, I decided to just go with it. I call Perry the feelings expert. You can tell how passionate she is on the subject. Perry talks about: The importance of learning about the difference between realization and integration and why you need both for happiness. What happens when you ignore your feelings Why feelings aren’t good or bad but more like breadcrumbs or little gold nuggets. How we can actually learn from our feelings. Why there is absolutely nothing wrong with you Why Perry’s clients call her the Tennessee Hound Dog What true mindfulness really is Why many women don’t even know how to feel their feelings? How minimizing certain feelings can lead to minimizing all feelings. The fact that there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. You just have never been taught the skills to deal with emotion.
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"Anger is gold. Because I know that the majority of the time that anger is up, is that there is a wound underneath. Always, I've never found it to be different."
- Perry Janssen
"There's nothing wrong with you. There's nothing wrong with your feelings, you have just not been taught the skills, how to deal with it. And that's our culture is bad Brilli, you know, in that you weren't taught emotional intelligence and how you deal with those feelings."
- Perry Janssen
"The problem is that if we squash, numb, compartmentalize, or pathologize feelings, we don't know what the true need is."
- Perry Janssen
- Perry discusses her art show and new series focused on women's bodies, emphasizing the importance of embracing all aspects of oneself.
- Perry emphasizes the importance of dealing with feelings and not shaming or apologizing for them.
- Perry and Tracy discuss emotional regulation in individuals with ADHD, avoiding shaming or pathologizing their experiences.
[14:31 - 32:00] ADHD, Medication, and Emotional Well-Being
- Perry discusses the concept of mindfulness and how it's often misunderstood in the West, with people thinking it's about thinking more consciously when it's actually about embodied presence and getting in the body to work with feelings.
- Perry and Tracy discuss the limitations of medication for mental health issues and the importance of addressing underlying emotions.
- Perry emphasizes the importance of considering alternative approaches to treating mental health issues, such as art journaling, painting, and pottery, rather than relying solely on medication.
[32:00 - 44:36] Mental Health, Happiness, and Emotional Expression
- Perry discusses the pressure to be happy and the limitations of the term "happy," suggesting that it's important to acknowledge and validate a range of emotions.
- Perry and Tracy emphasize the need to create space for people to feel and process their emotions without judgment, and to practice mindfulness to be present with what is arising.
- Perry and Tracy discuss the importance of emotional intelligence in ADHD women, with Perry emphasizing that there's nothing wrong with their feelings and that they just need to learn how to deal with them.
