Jan 14
We have executive functions that help us in life. They help us organize, plan and control our life so it’s manageable. It’s how we can take care of ourselves and get things done. Most of us with ADHD have trouble with one or more of the six executive functions.
Today, I am talking about the executive function that involves emotion. It’s what helps us manage frustration and it gives us the ability to regulate our emotions. Here are the key elements Tracy has learned when dealing with emotions and situations that can become emotional.
Tracy explains emotional dysregulation and how it shows up and how it impacts us. How does stress impact our emotions and how do recognize it in ourselves and in others? Tracy shares how perfectionism and time management affect her emotions and how she’s learned to work around these situations. Intensity is a big part of ADHD and it’s a big part of managing emotions as well. Tracy’s experience with the Apple watch, and how it’s helped her be able to cook again! What can you do when emotional intensity comes up? Listen for some go-to solutions that can help you manage or even remove an emotionally charged situation. You can choose.
Tracy shares that awareness is separate from emotion and thought. How to identify and name what is causing the emotion and doing this exercise can help. Don’t miss Tracy’s bull frog story. It’ll make you smile. Why allowing ourselves to feel the feelings can ultimately help you eliminate the feeling. If you want different results, you need to change your behavior. Emotions don’t always lead to a behavior; sometimes it’s the opposite. Self-control is a neurobiological trait. It requires the ability to have hind-sight and fore-sight and the ability to wait. Understanding how this impacts behavior is key to managing emotions. , Psychotherapist gave us great tips you’ll find helpful.
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"Intensity is such a part of ADHD. So that often means emotional intensity as well."
- Tracy Otsuka
"If you can really focus on what you're feeling that stomach that's a knots that puppy, that puppy that's bouncing around in it, guess what will happen, you'll stop feeling that feeling, because studies show that emotions only last about 90 seconds."
- Tracy Otsuka
"We tend to get up in our heads when we're upset. Again, we're thinking we're thinking more thinking. And the truth is that our thoughts are what is responsible for our emotions."
- Tracy Otsuka
- Tracy shares personal experiences with anxiety and ADHD, including difficulty with time management and consistently feeling stressed before social events.
- Tracy struggles with time management and perfectionism, leading to emotional spinning and difficulty starting tasks.
- Tracy has learned to be hyper-organized to compensate for her deficiencies, but still needs adrenaline to motivate her to get things done.
[08:07 - 15:21] Managing Emotional Intensity with ADHD
- Tracy shares a humorous anecdote about hosting a tea party for her daughter's first birthday, revealing her tendency to overplan and underdeliver under pressure.
- Tracy discusses how she has found the Apple Watch helpful in managing her ADHD, particularly in the kitchen, where she can now cook with greater ease and confidence.
- Tracy finds that exercising in the morning helps calm her mind and set her day, while nature (such as gardening) and deep breathing also help her manage emotional intensity.
[15:21 - 25:10] ADHD Coaching and Its Benefits
- Tracy suggests pausing and breathing to control emotions, recognizing that thoughts and stories in one's head may not be true.
- Tracy recognizes that self-control is a neurobiological trait, not learned behavior, and this understanding helps her be more empathetic and patient with her children.
- Tracy's daughter's good manners and son's differences are attributed to their inherent temperaments, rather than parenting styles, and she adjusts her approach accordingly.
